May 2013
2 posts
January 2013
58 posts
Blessed
I’m Sorry, Thank You, and I Love You.
These are the three phrases that should be said everyday to the people around you. This is what I learned during a retreat in high school. And forever will I continue to say these essential words.
It has been a very long time since I’ve been able to post something personal on my blog. I think “lazy” and “school” are enough reasons for my absence. This year has started off with the utmost hope, encouragement, and motivation. 2013 spells family in my dictionary. It reeks of family arguments, family disagreements, family feuds, and most especially family love.
Two Thousand Twelve
Last year ended with a bang—my brother is no longer engaged. He became extremely dependent on cigarettes and strong alcohol to tame his tangled emotions and anger. He left to Korea, despising the sight of Americans and anything that reminded him of his ex-fiancé, which basically was everything. He came back three months later, the same week I had returned home from finishing a quarter at PSU. He no longer remembered the definition (and feeling) of sobriety, nor did words like happiness or love exist in his dictionary. With patience, gestures of kindness, and often upright movements of the lips that exhibited some sort of comfort, gentility and hospitability, were carried out under the Han household. I constantly reminded my brother of the meaning of happiness, family, and love with forced sounds from my throat in expression of my amusement and joy. It has been six years since the three members of the Han/Lee family slept and ate under the same shingled roof. It made my mother uncomfortable and it made me feel more at home than ever. I woke up every morning staring at the door where behind those closed doors, my brother snored his soon-to-be angered thoughts and distasteful addiction away. He had first set goals for his redemption back into the real world—he was to study for his GRE and apply to prospective graduate schools. He was to pursue his masters in Mechanical Engineering and further his career insights. Note: reduction of the consumption of alcohol and tobacco was not on his agenda.
I left my workaholic mother and alcoholic brother in California to finish off my second year at PSU. I was nervous about leaving my mom and brother alone but God had taken care of this matter already.
That special someone…
